Old Folks

An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy.

They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard.

They searched for days and couldn't find her, so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something.

Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat.

It read: 'Sir, sorry to inform you, we found your wife dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her butt was an oyster and in it was a pearl worth $50,000. Please advise.'

The old man faxed back: 'Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap.'

$40,000 Funeral

John died.

His will provided $40,000 for an elaborate funeral.

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife Ann turned to her oldest and dearest friend.

'Well, I'm sure John would be pleased,' she said.
'I'm sure you're right,' replied Brenda , who lowered her voice and leaned in close.'

How much did this really cost?''

All of it,' said Ann 'Forty thousand.'

'No!' Brenda exclaimed. 'I mean, it was very nice, but $40,000?'

Ann answered, 'The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to church. The whiskey, wine and snacks were another $500. The rest went for the Memorial Stone.'

Brenda computed quickly. '$32,500 for a Memorial Stone? How big is it?'